The Sweetser Story as presented at Rev. Terry Sweeter’s farewell service on June 19, 2022
Good morning.
It was my intention to read a story for all ages, and I had an appropriate book in mind that would help celebrate Reverend Terry’s time with us, but, unfortunately, when I went to the library someone had already checked out “The Berenstain Bears Become Bah’ai’s.”
Therefore, this morning’s reading comes from the Unitarian Universalist bible, The Uncertainty, fifteenth edition, as translated from Boston English—which is why it took fifteen editions. Specifically, I’ll read from the book of SUUS, chapter 47, verses 97 through 743.
It was during a time of change when there was a town the natives referred to as Madison, and within it a free-thinking oasis called SUUS. And though governed by the people, SUUS required a leader to guide them through times of trouble as well as times of plenty.
And the people called Sa’Adah to guide them. And Sa’Adah begat Robinson, who begat Korb, who begat Herrick, who begat Johnson-Fay, who begat Nelson, who begat Swain, who begat Osgood, who begat Wilson. And Wilson begat Elferdink, who begat Oglesby, who begat Lloyd, who immediately wrote a covenant to forever banish the word “begat.”
It was during the last year of the reign of Lloyd that a terrible pestilence swept not only Madison, but the entire world—except North Korea, of course. And SUUS’s tabernacle was left empty of its people. But not only SUUS, but all the meetinghouses, and churches, synagogues, temples, mosques, Dunkin’ Donuts, and even Panera Breads were left vacant. And the people of SUUS were bereft. For how could they receive guidance and inspiration if they were without communal gatherings?
But in a faraway land, Eric Yune, of San Jose, brought forth Zoom, and said the people could now meet virtually! And the oasis of SUUS jumped at this most excellent opportunity and found, like most of the world, it was clunky. Faces were unclear, voices were garbled, and virtual gatherings froze without warning. And the people wept, even those with fiber optic connectivity.
The people of SUUS searched, for their time with Lloyd was at an end and two committees were formed: one to find a new guide and one to find a better word than “begat.”
And in a far northern wasteland arose a guide who approached SUUS and said, “Behold, I am Sweetser of Maine, and I bring you guidance, wisdom, spirituality, knowledge of things financial, and more. And look here: I have been to the top of the mountain and bring you tools to make Zoom better!” And the people wept. They wept largely because his message froze while he was delivering it.
But then, Sweetser of Maine used his tools and applied his skills and knowledge. He attached odd, mysterious cords and cameras, and he strove mightily with Amy of Buckley, Nick of Piano, and Worship of Committee, to provide the virtual gatherings that went well; far, far better than the people had expected. The people rediscovered inspiration, music, camaraderie, and, which is more, they found their faith renewed. And the people wept with joy.
Sweetser of Maine then met with the SUUS Board of Trustees. And he worked with them, sharing his knowledge and skills of things financial, of organization, of optimism, and, yes, even of humor. And the board wept.
Then, as the people developed careful practices and accepted medical assistance, their fear of the pestilence became somewhat manageable. Sweetser of Maine, with the leaders of SUUS, was now able to seize the opportunity and developed a system whereby the communal gatherings could simultaneously be live and virtual. And the people wept with joy, as Mary of Strieff started a fundraiser selling tissues to those who just would not stop weeping.
And so it came to pass that very soon will be the end of Sweetser of Maine’s time with SUUS. But he leaves behind a congregation much stronger and filled with hope than it had known during the darkest days of the pestilence; a congregation that understands the light at their end of their tunnel comes from a chalice. And the people’s hearts are overflowing with joy. Excepting, of course, those on the ad hoc committee that still hasn’t found a replacement for “begat.”
Can I hear a “hallelujah?” Will someone give me an “amen?”
Thus ends the reading. You’re UUs; talk amongst yourselves.